Pity those poor lawyers. This year a whiny, greedy one was eaten by a tyrannosaurus in Jurassic Park; a porky, frightened one was chased by a lassoing cowboy in a Miller Lite commercial; and the very thought of his son turning into one sent poor Gomez Addams into a deep depression in Addams Family Values.
With that in mind, we asked a few lawyers: What’s the best lawyer joke you heard this year?
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Patsy Felch, Chicago lawyer/agent: The one I really know is a motion joke. There are two guys at a bar standing next to each other. The one on the right keeps knocking into the other one. And finally the other one says, “What the hell is wrong with you?” The first guy says, “Oh, I’m so sorry. I’ve been a sailor for 20 years and I just can’t stop knocking into people. I got so used to the motion of the ship.”
What do you call 100 lawyers at the bottom of the sea?
Bernardine Dohrn, director of the Juvenile Court Project at Northwestern University School of Law: My favorite joke is the one that everyone must have heard. It made the rounds.
His lips are moving.
The lawyer says, “Fuck the boys.”
