WOOLLCOTT DIED FOR YOU!
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Bill Thomas is one of them. Worse still, he is a would-be actor too, and he has combined these two avocations into a painfully inept one-man show called Woollcott Died for You! Thomas tries to deflect criticism of his effort by printing “a work in progress” on the playbill, but “in progress” is too ambitious, too optimistic to describe what I witnessed opening night. Even calling it a “work” requires audacity.
Thomas was ill prepared and awkward. He followed an outline scribbled on a piece of cardboard mounted on an easel propped in front of him, and shuffled through index cards looking for the anecdotes and quips that make up the script. He lost one of the cards, and while fumbling around managed to tip the microphone onto a customer’s glass of wine. The Woollcott that Thomas conjures up does not die for us–he is ruthlessly assassinated by a would-be performer who should be stopped before he kills again.
What on earth made Thomas think people would want to watch this? Woollcott Died for You! certainly is not entertaining, and it’s not very informative either. The production values are just plain trashy–the backdrop, for example, consists of a strip of newsprint with green squares drawn on it, apparently to suggest the oak paneling of the Algonquin.
